After Luca and Olin were born, I understood parenthood for the first time: the way it teaches you selflessness and the new joys, anxieties and sacrifices that come with it. I remember my first birthday celebration after the twins arrived and my parents calling early in the morning to sing “Las mañanitas” to me. It became suddenly overwhelming. I tried to explain to them the enormity of what I was feeling as a new father. I wanted them to know that I finally understood what it must have been like for them when they were a young couple starting out on the road of life and welcoming their first son. Words failed me and there were mostly tears of gratitude.

A few days ago I celebrated my birthday again.

I lost my mother back in September and I’ve missed her every day since but especially on that day. I found a flask of cologne she had given me as a gift a few years back. Dabbing some on, I let the memory of her linger with me throughout the day, helping me through as she always did.